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Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character
Seem like a decent slice of life novel here
Reviewed at: Chapter 07 / Fireworks...
by Arashi Zaros Thursday, December 3, 2020 5:33:13 AM
(top part was when I read chapter 3)
From what I read so far, it seem not bad and not those too cliche'/badly written romance novel like the one on webnovel there, and it seem from the first chapter, there maybe some future chapter where the author handle mental scar a bit ? (maybe not go too deep), and his wife do draw for the novel, so that a plus with map and character look there :3. The Mc seem quite lovely a bit, not the edgy type and also quite OP, but trying to learn her power there. The setting is more into the mythology + fantasy in japan there and the authore seem quite researched into that ?. And bonus is long chapter (cons is he seem to already bulk release most of the chapter, so have to slow it down, so no faster release there unless he stock more chapter and bulk release again, which is confirmed by author)
also quote from author answer about the novel in first chapter comment:
"1. Yes she will begin utilizing improvments. This will allow her to make the lives of the villagers better and that in essence is Taka's personal goal. (so some simple tech invention)
2. Remember, Ileria is an odd mishmash or as Taka puts it plagerized version of Earth. So she is still figuring out what advancments and what is lacking.
3. YES a huge yes on land development. This is explained in a later chapter."
But the only cons that I can see is the use of paragraph/grammar, which at least readable, but a bit jarring/interrupt the flow in some part (but that early chapter, so the still can improve it), so unless you are one of the very harsh grammar nazi who just disregard the rest of the story just because of grammar error and only focus in that problem, then it decent enough, and maybe over describe in some part in the novel (mostly for main character who author already described but that early chapter so maybe not later ?), not sure about writing style but it seem decent enough (at least not like the mess I see in some novel I read before), and I didn't read as many good slice of life novel so don't have experience to judge it aside from 'Grimmar's of fantasy and ash'
, for now 5 stars to encourage the new author, this is for current first review right now in early chapter, will change after reading more,
Edit at 3-12: now I at chapter 6, it actually really good there, and although there are a lot of grammar mistake, I already point out and fix it, and good new is that the author also buy a grammar fixer app so there will be less grammar problem later on, too (of course every grammar App is not perfect so some maybe missed). That chapter 4 is where it become good where we get more glime on her past/mental scar and why she a bit like that there, and the author handle it quite well and know how to take care of former victim, and great character development further more as you read, after chapter 5 thing become more warn and not being 'edgy' so far, with how everyone interact and not seem forced. About chapter 5 forward also where we begin to see the mc try to invent/build some simple but convenient stuff, too, and the way she handle most of the problem without violent (aside from that brute) is quite legit enough.
At chapter 7 certain reader point out the flaw I didn't notice, at least the author acknowledge it and do give some explain for some (like quicker pace, it like that for first few chapter), so if you see some possible flaw, try read his and author comment at chapter 7 to see the explain of that and see if it intentional or not (even if it not, the problem are not too bad that it make you quit reading and he plan to fix it)
. Will do further review after I read more chapter later
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Overall
Pacing
Reviewed at: Chapter 06 / Two Birds...One Stone
by ReneeWolf Wednesday, December 1, 2021 12:49:09 AM
Got to chapter 6 before the pacing got to me. She wasn't there three days before she left the shrine twice, has a rather large change of self gets at least one magic teacher, etc. She gets a few people and they are extremely loyal in a day? Where is the time to heal, connect and such? It probably is better for others but I quit at the first sign of romance because there's fast and then there is not realizing that even the brief bits she remembers would need more than 6days to get over. Your pacing is just a bit quick for this.
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Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character
Cute slice of life (plus time skips & some issues)
Reviewed at: Chapter 10/ Are You Afraid of the Dark?...
by CasualDarkSouls Thursday, March 25, 2021 2:30:07 PM
It is probably not the story you think it is, but this is a fairly good/cute slice of life story. I would recommend it for anyone who likes that and who also likes Japanese mythology.
Grammar is generally good with only a few awkward phrases. (Does heavily use Japanese lore and terms for things though)
The story is cute, you can enjoy the nice life she is getting. She is generally kind to a fault. The POV for the other characters are not bad. I would even say the falling in love of the cast is done well (if accelerated and a bit sudden because of the time skips)
I want to make it clear, the story is not bad for what it is as I am now going to give some more harsh feedback. These problems can be summed up as
It time skips a lot. All the interesting points are just skipped right to making it not quite a slice of life... the MC does not struggle with learning or doing anything so it is hard to get invested in anything... and the trama feels VERY superficial. It is only mentioned at and for plot points then left behind. (Also the trama of the slaves and Moto's should be roughly on par or worse than hers, but it is not described that way)
Details below:
Style: the biggest problem is the time skips. It is clear that the author wants to hit the interesting parts of the story, but is a bit extreme.
Also, It is mostly written in 1st person but there are a few times it isn't when a character suddenly knows inner thoughts or something. I know it is probably the tail or something, but it should be said not assumed.
Characters: The MC is a a bit of a Mary Sue.... Note this is not a problem in the normal sense as this story is NOT really and adventure or building/crafting story and she is already worshiped as she is connected to the gods..... It is just that she learns everything to do with her powers so quickly that it a bit unfufilling as she just does it. It would have been exciting to have her slowly learn how to bless, charge the barriers, cook without modern tool etc.... There are no threats so she could take that time.
Also the Mary Sue section of everyone loving her is a bit excessive. She is normally very nice to people so they would come to love her, but it happens so quick it is jarring at times.
She also has a bad past with it affecting her in her sleep and what not, and I know her new fox nature makes her impulsive, but she is extremely impulsive to the point of recklessness looking into it.
(She is also impulsive at almost every other time, but it hasn't been a problem as those are safe ideas.)
I know her trama is bad, but her trama is considered much worse than others.... Despite them having their names beat out of them to the point one is mute. And a war happened where people were slaughtering each other... While she went to school and allowed to do crafts in her free time. It would have been a good plot point to have her realize that while it was horrible and unforgivable, others have had it much worse. (also she needs a plan to do more to help slaves then buying just 3...and overpaying...kinda stupid really)
All of her support cast come in too quickly. She doesn't need to wonder about things as she is just told by some ancient being or other (making it feel like a lore dump sometime). It makes it hard to feel she is growing... Again not terrible, it just makes it more of a slice of life not an growth story or adventure.
The time skips make it hard to have pay off. They decide to gather things to sell in town, then they do that...then they sell them... That is it. We don't even find out what they gathered that was useful to the town people considering they probably forage in the mountains too.
So yeah, everything is just a bit superficial. It is not bad as a light hearted slice of life, but the execution is a bit lacking.
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